Q&A with Jayden Steele
A Big thanks to Jayden and Callum
Q. Jayden, you self identify as an “alpha sub” who thrives in intense kink spaces, from Locktober chastity challenges to bruising spanking sessions. Can you kick things off by telling us how you discovered your passion for BDSM and what makes it such a central part of your life?
A. So for me kink has always been a central part of my life, I knew even as a kid that I got weirdly excited seeing/reading about people (generally prisoners) being tied up or punished in movies, comics and books. I had a fascination hearing about Houdini when I was young and tried plenty of ‘games’ of being tied up by someone and then having to escape. To answer your question of what makes it such a central part of my life; I’ve generally always been attracted to the more extreme things in life and situations where I really have to push myself past pain so BDSM has really just been another iteration of that.
Q. Your content is heavily focused on gay/bi kink spaces. How has your sexuality shaped your journey in the kink community?
A. I would consider myself Bisexual now but generally more submissive with women and more dominant with guys. In my younger teen years growing up in a conservative family + small town I always just assumed I was straight but just got turned on by the idea of being tied up or spanked by someone no matter the gender. I never really got off thinking about sex (with either gender) until I’d already explored my main kink of spanking/bondage and began to understand all the parts of it that turned me on like the power exchange, humiliation, exposure and loss of control.
Q. Your posts often feature intense spanking and paddling. What draws you to spanking as a core part of your kink identity, and how do you balance pleasure with the physical intensity?
A. As I mentioned earlier, spanking was probably my first fetish and before my first real spanking at barely 18, I almost exclusively jerked off to spanking porn. My first real session I organised through fetlife where I met up with a Master who had been in the scene for over 20 years spanking boys like me who needed some discipline. I sent him a video of a ‘no way out’ spanking punishment clip where a guy was strapped down and spanked relentlessly until he was bruised, welted and almost crying, I told the Dom that I’d always wanted to be properly spanked and that I’d been smoking and felt like I needed to be punished. One thing I discovered (that I think many other spankees will resonate with) is that when the spanking actually becomes painful, I get soft and I’m not actually turned on. I’m just in a lot of pain and trying to stay in position and take my punishment. For me, being spanked is not pleasurable when it’s happening but in the days after I’m always more calm and enjoy the reminder when I try to sit down.
Q. What’s your favorite roleplay scenario involving spanking?
A. It definitely used to be teacher/student but these days it’s probably cop/lawbreaker, perhaps a robber who breaks into the wrong house and has to either submit to spanking or be arrested, maybe a young guy pulled over and caught speeding/drunk driving and the only way to not go to prison is by getting spanked by the cop. On top of that the idea of being given a sentence of bare bottom spanking to be carried out in a public space like courthouse or a town square stocks has always been a big turn on for me too.
Q. Off or on camera , have you ever explored popular roleplay themes, like coach/jock or stepdad/stepson , in your spanking scenes? If so, which scenario gets you most excited, and how does it enhance the sub/dom dynamic for you?
A. Yes definitely! As you know I do both M/M and F/M spanking and a few I’ve tried are student/teacher, dad/son, roommates, aunt/nephew & cop/robber. I think my tastes/fantasy role-plays have also evolved as I’ve gotten older for example when I first started getting spanked (an age where many people are still at high school) it was easier for me to get into a teacher/student headspace or babysitter/troublemaker headspace than now at 23. Generally I really like domestic style spanking scenes as opposed to something in in a dungeon or with a lot of equipment (although a proper judical Malaysian or Singaporean style caning is still something I want to experience), essentially I want it to feel as ‘realistic’ as possible hence why a cop/prisoner or coach/jock is a bit more attractive to me now.
Q. As someone who switches between sub and dominate firstly what qualities would your dream male top bring to a spanking scene to push your limits as an alpha sub, and how would you describe the ideal dynamic with them?
A. This is an interesting question which I’ve developed the answer to over the years of being spanked by various people and trying to understand the qualities of someone that gets me into the right headspace. The ideal male top for me is someone that is bigger than me, stronger than me, highly self disciplined (because if you can’t be disciplined yourself how can you discipline someone else), emotionally mature, financially stable, good sense of humour and also a caring person with good intentions and not just a desire to have power over someone else because they feel like they have no power over their own lives.
I would say I’m not an ideal spankee for many doms because I’m quite an independent person who doesn’t like being told what to do or having to ask permission for stuff (some might call it bratty) so I struggle dynamics where the spanker/dom wants to ‘guide’ me – however I think this is more because I haven’t found a dom that ticks all my boxes (yet).
Q. Secondly When you take on the dominant role, what’s your vision of the perfect male bottom for a spanking session? Are there specific traits or reactions you look for to make the experience unforgettable?
A. As with most kink communication is the most important so having someone who knows how to communicate both desires and limits is essential. In terms of body type I generally like twinks/twunks that are a bit smaller than me and I often take on the role of a coach (which is also what I do). My favourite subs are always those who I can take to their pain limit and they continue pushing, as a Dom/Coach/Spanker I generally don’t do anything to someone that I haven’t experienced as a sub and I haven’t yet had the opportunity to spank someone to proper tears although I would love to find a spankee that I can do it with.
Q. Your content spans chastity, BDSM, and more , as spanking is favouritekinknof yours have you ever considered running a dedicated spanking-only account?
A. Yes most people will probably know me from my main x account @jaydensteele21 but I’ve recently created a spanking only account called @spankedboydiary
A. I’ll answer this from a spanking perspective and to no surprise to probably anyone the best collaborators for spanking are the ones who specialise in that. I would say my top 3 favourites to work with/be spanked by are:
1. Lady Jose
2. Hotspotharrison
3. Sphqkc1
You can follow Callum on X by clicking here
